Please Don’t Listen To Me

(This was written a few days after the Orlando nightclub shootings and not posted until now.  I was still feeling a bit like my words just weren’t adequate for the situation at the time.  Not sure if they are now, but do feel called to share this)

Don’t Listen. To me.  Especially this week when there are so many other voices making noise.  Making noise about guns, noise about hatred, noise about religious beliefs, noise about sexuality, noise about safety, noise about protection, noise about government leaders, noise about laws, noise about politicians, noise, noise, noise….

Why?  Because, my words, no matter how they are written or spoken are going to divide us.  You will either agree or disagree and I probably won’t change that.  Or you may not even understand me at all.  My words are written in my first and pretty much only language (American English) that only a segment of the people of the world can read and comprehend.  And even if English is your first language, you may still mis-understand the intent I hope to convey.  So, I won’t.  Try.  To Convey Thoughts or Ideas. Now.  When we need most to be reminded of our Oneness.  And words just won’t can’t do that.

A few years ago I was a visiting teaching artist for several weeks to one of Chicago area’s “alternative schools”.  When I took the “gig” I really didn’t know what that meant exactly: “alternative”.  Well this was a school for middle school aged children (young adults) who had been “kicked out” of regular public school for “mis-behaviour”.   I was told going into the position that I could not use “gang affiliated colors”.  What were those?  Well, black, red, grey, silver, blue, yellow, green, and on and on.  How do you do art projects without the three primaries and black, I ask?  Well, I had them dyeing yarns and weaving with pastel shades and got very creative in resolving this issue.  At the same time I was working with a 2nd grade class in a suburban elementary school and we were learning about “symbols” and creating art that “symbolized” who we were.  Soccer balls, baseball bats, flowers, rainbows all played into their imagery.  Words, symbols, colors, flags, songs, manifestos, all defining who we are individually and collectively in our small groups.  All very important at separating us.  What is important to utilize when working to unite us?

I want to believe that if there were no words, if there were no language you could feel my intent.  I want to be like our bright sun as it came out from hiding behind the cloud or the tree.  I will share my Light.  I will share my Vibration.  I will share my Love.  Please see the Brightness.  Please feel the Tingle.  Please embrace the Warmth.  But please don’t listen, there is nothing here to hear.  Please just FEEL IT.  2014-01-06 16.02.08

Mountain Top

Mountain Top
My view on a camping trip to Shenandoah National Park circa 2007.

This morning as I transitioned out of sleep I heard that Voice that whispers to me before my head gets cluttered with the thoughts of the day.  (I am not a person who likes to jump out of bed at the sound of an alarm. I linger and listen. I get my best guidance in this liminal space.)  The Voice said, “We are so pleased, Pam. You made it over the mountain top.”

What do  I see from the mountain top?  I expect to see a beautiful fertile valley below, but it’s still “early in the day” and the fog is hiding the view.  So, I will linger here for a while.  I will wait for the path ahead to clear. I will enjoy the beauty as it gradually appears through the mist.  I know the trek ahead will become so much easier. I have made it over the Mountain Top!  Thank you, Guides for helping me get here and for celebrating my arrival.  I couldn’t have done it without You.

 

 

Quieting the New Mo(o)nkey Mind

image

Saturday, June 4, 2016. New Moon. Card of the Day (for me). The Hanged Man XII.  Well, I should have seen that coming! That is exactly the energy I am feeling this morning. This new moon energy has a feeling of sadness and a little grieving as I try to release “the old”. But that is the message of the hanged man: “Waiting, Surrender, Release”.  So easy to say. So hard to do.  The “monkey mind” just wants to know ” what’s next?”.  The hanged man just answers, “take this time of waiting as an opportunity to practice being present with yourself.”  The new moon says, “the answers will show up with the light of the full moon. Just wait.”  And so I let go of yesterday and sit with TODAY.

Letters from the Future

The following is a hypothetical letter.  I wrote it myself as though my sister has written it to me 26 years from now on my birthday.  I wrote it as an exercise for a Circle of transitioning Women led by Circle Tender, Susan Lucci that I am a part of.  The assignment was to imagine a celebration near the end of your life and ask some of the guests to speak on your behalf about your life and how you fulfilled your “Life’s Desires”.  In light of the issues our world is facing in the NOW this was very therapeutic for me.  Here is the hypothetical letter from my sister:

Happy Birthday Pam!  Can you believe that you are 80 years old and I am just a couple of weeks from being 79?  Who would have thought this is how the world would be in 2042?  Oh yeah, you would have!  You always believed and you were right, that the world and the humans living here would begin to transform and shift when we were in our early 50’s.  That we could overcome the issues of poverty and climate change during our lifetime.  I always loved calling you on the phone, (remember those crazy old devices necessary to communicate?)  and hearing about the books you were reading about the Unity Consciousness and our Higher Selves.  And that ET’s are Us!

Yes, I remember when you were younger that you would get frustrated and discouraged that you weren’t sure how to bring your value and implement your desires in the world.  And you were disappointed that your work didn’t really support yourself.   That you always had to rely on your husband’s income for the survival of your family.  But remember, that was back when we had the old money and banking system.  You were one of the few who believed we could find a better way to “survive”.  Oh yeah, not survive, but THRIVE and flourish.  And that abundance was a “basic right” that All Humans were born to on our planet Earth.  And you were correct.  Just see how fast that concept came to be accepted and implemented?  And your energy, faith, and creative vision were a part of our collective ascension into this new flourishing life for ALL.  You helped others SEE that this was possible.  You helped me see it, even though it meant I had to transform my own business and livelihood away from helping people file their annual income tax returns. (And pay the taxes!  Oh, remember how horrible it was for people to have to do that every year?)  The fact that there are so few people suffering and “in need” now, and that we no longer pay for WAR and military expenses as a nation has really made it so much easier for people.  And I much preferred helping people decide what to do with their abundance and decide how to best share their wealth and “pay it forward” as they used to say!

Oh, and remember that summer evening under the stars when our children were young and we were sitting around the bonfire in my backyard?  The kids were running around in the dark playing on their “walkie-talkie radios”  (Talk about old-time communications!)  You pretended to talk to them like an alien from “Planet Micro-Brew”.  A few years later micro-breweries were everywhere!  And then a few years after that the Earth made peaceful and mutually beneficial contact with Advanced Life out in the Universe.  It was like you could SEE it that night looking out at the far away stars above our fire.  You also had a way of looking into the Flames of the Fire for “Life’s Answers”, too.

I thank you so much for being my older sister, my friend, guide, mentor and visionary.  You’ve always been there when I’ve needed you.  It’s so nice now to be psychically connected so that we don’t need to worry about the phone to communicate anymore.  Now, whenever we need to we can hear, feel and KNOW how much the Other One cares and loves us.  Even when we are apart.  Oh yeah, there is no such thing as “apart”.  We are each our individual spark of the Unity that is Life.  Thank you for making the Soul Contract to be the spark that guided me into this life with you in it.  As you Know, I love you.

Your Sister, B~

Note:  I went searching in my gift card pile for the perfect card to imagine having this letter written on and I found this.  The artwork is by Helena Nelson-Reed.  The Synchronicity of this card’s message goes beyond “perfect” to DIVINE!

 

Mesa Clearing and Activation 2016

We just experienced a solar eclipse.  Did you feel it?  I ask that because those of us in the USA were not be able to see it.  But, the energy did affect all of us here on the Earth Vessel.  This will be the only total eclipses of the sun in 2016.  It gives scientists the rare opportunity to really study the Sun’s Corona.  It is a rare opportunity for all of us to use the energy of the shadow brought to light, to really clear out what is in our shadows and bring into the light what we would like to focus on over the next 6 months.

On February 20th, I worked alongside a few of my Moon Medicine Circle friends to cleanse, clear and give gratitude to what I had been holding on my Mesa over the past year.  My Mesa is a small metal tray that I hold crystals and meaningful objects to work with their energies for meditation and healing.  Here is what my Mesa looked like going in to the ceremony:

Old Mesa 2.20.2016
Mesa before Clearing 2.20.2016

For the clearing of the old I used my pendulum on each item to feel the energy and determine what pieces would stay and what pieces would be cleared.  I also used Himalayan salts and smudging to clear old stuck energies.  Here it is after the clearing:

Cleared Mesa 2.20.2016
Cleared Mesa 2.20.2016

The cleared Mesa left me with just a few special items and a lot of open space for new opportunities over this coming year.  In the North I have raw amethyst and in the East I have topaz crystals that I picked up at a little gift shop last October while hiking through a forest preserve (and talking to the trees) in Southern Illinois.  In the Northeast is the lovely pine scented candle that my daughter gave me as a gift for Christmas.  The South holds a piece of ash from a fire ceremony last December and a special stone my friend Karen brought back from South America while there studying shamanism.  In the Southwest is the wing of a grouse that gave his life by accidently flying through my brother’s kitchen window, breaking the glass.  My nephew cleaned the bird, saving me the feathers!  And my brother’s family had a special dinner that night.  The West holds a sea shell from my friend and Transitions Circle Facilitator, Susan.  And in the center is the Selenite Heart that I acquired in February along with a drying rose from the funeral of my friend Lisa’s mother a few weeks ago.   These are all very special treasures.

Last night into early morning the New Moon and Eclipse occured creating a special portal for Activating the New Mesa.  After blessing my Mesa I left her near the window to activate with the dark moon energies.  This morning I lit the candle and felt guided to add a few new items.  This is my Mesa today:

March New Moon Mesa 2. 2016
Activated Mesa 3.9.2016

First I wanted to add the beautiful cotton handkerchief, a gift from my friend Jane.  It has a lovely crochet butterfly and edging along with some amazing fine thread work in the center.  I then added the new fossil stone that looks like it has a leaf print on it that my friend, Lisa gave me for my birthday last Friday. Then a small pinecone jumped on too!  And finally, to bring in the energy of my paternal grandma who came to me in a dream last night, I added three metal leaves from a broken necklace that were from her jewelry box.  Grandma, I hear you.  I feel your love and guidance (there is that dance word again!) I look forward to heading into my “new year” with you by my side.

I urge you to do something to honor the special energy of this portal provided to us by the Universe.  Offer just one small ceremonial clearing and one little thought of what you would like to see manifest between now and early September.  If you allow the space and the ideas/thoughts the Ancestor and Star/Planet Guides are just waiting to be invited in to assist you in creating your dream come true.  Ajo!